I wrote this short thought and put it on facebook nearly three years ago when I came home from China. I just recently found it again as I cleaned out all the junk, and thought it was worth sharing, along with some exciting news!
It reads:
"Tonight I was sitting with Hope on the couch. She saw a picture of a little baby holding my hand on the background of my phone. This little baby slipped away in the night just a little more than a month ago to be with Jesus. At first, she told me she was sad that he had gone away, but I told her he was so happy to be with his Savior. My mind drifted back to that day. Truly significant in every way, I knew exactly why I was there. Hope shook me out of my thoughts about him by asking if I was there when Jesus came to get him. I told her no, I had to go back to my house before that. Then she asked, "Well, did you see Jesus while you were there?" I looked at her and smiled as realization reached my brain and said, "Yes, I did. Every single day." I got to look into the face of Jesus every single day. Tears rolled gently down my cheeks while I remembered and understood how I had held Him, fed Him, and took care of Him. Every day. I had learned a lesson of the greatest importance my life. In the most broken places, He shows His face the most. And for the first time since I came home from China I thought about how *I* had gotten to serve *Him* in the midst of His forgotten place. For the first time I didn't feel anger at the fact that I wasn't at a point in my life where I could just be there again, but I remembered the reason I loved it so much in the first place. Because the day I held those babies in my arms for the first time, was the day that I met Jesus. He allowed me to see His face. Through those tiny little babies, He gave me the greatest gift of all; an understanding of the way He loves me."
"You did not choose me, but I chose you, and appointed you, that you should go and bear fruit, and that your fruit should remain, that whatever you ask the Father in my name, He may give you. These things I command you, that you love one another." John 15: 16-17
It reads:
"Tonight I was sitting with Hope on the couch. She saw a picture of a little baby holding my hand on the background of my phone. This little baby slipped away in the night just a little more than a month ago to be with Jesus. At first, she told me she was sad that he had gone away, but I told her he was so happy to be with his Savior. My mind drifted back to that day. Truly significant in every way, I knew exactly why I was there. Hope shook me out of my thoughts about him by asking if I was there when Jesus came to get him. I told her no, I had to go back to my house before that. Then she asked, "Well, did you see Jesus while you were there?" I looked at her and smiled as realization reached my brain and said, "Yes, I did. Every single day." I got to look into the face of Jesus every single day. Tears rolled gently down my cheeks while I remembered and understood how I had held Him, fed Him, and took care of Him. Every day. I had learned a lesson of the greatest importance my life. In the most broken places, He shows His face the most. And for the first time since I came home from China I thought about how *I* had gotten to serve *Him* in the midst of His forgotten place. For the first time I didn't feel anger at the fact that I wasn't at a point in my life where I could just be there again, but I remembered the reason I loved it so much in the first place. Because the day I held those babies in my arms for the first time, was the day that I met Jesus. He allowed me to see His face. Through those tiny little babies, He gave me the greatest gift of all; an understanding of the way He loves me."
There has been no greater way in which I have understood God's love for me. He was MERCIFUL in allowing me to discover a small part of the way He loves my own heart, by letting me love Him, through loving THEM. Just to see their faces, to hear stories, to remember, it awakens my passion for His Justice and love and the love He has instilled inside of me that goes so far beyond my own all over again.
The exciting news:
My best friend and I are venturing out with God to the stunningly beautiful country of Costa Rica this summer for the months of July and August. Though we are going as students first and foremost, we know that God has called us to make His name famous and to care for the oppressed wherever we go and whatever we do. We are praying even now for open doors, open hearts, and opportunities to share the love of our Savior in practical ways with the people of Costa Rica. Though it is one of the more developed countries in this region of the world, there are still many who live in extreme poverty, and the country (sadly) boasts one of the largest underage sex tourism industries in the Western hemisphere.
Pray with us for:
1. Doors, minds, hearts, and ears to be opened before we even arrive.
2. That we would not be blind to those that suffer
3. Wisdom. Traveling overseas without any kind of guidance in terms of ministry is a tricky and sensitive matter. Pray that we would be open to the voice and wisdom of the Holy Spirit at all times in all situations.
4. That we would walk in His will for us, to know when He is asking us to make the decisions, and when He is clearly directing our steps.
5. Safety. My youth pastor used to always say; "the safest place to be is in the center of His will. What's the worst that could happen? You're spending eternity with Him regardless of when you get there."
6. Academic success. Our hearts are for the people in CR, but we also will have to remain faithful to our studies. Pray for focus!
7. Divine connections with the people God has in store for us to meet and enter into fellowship with.
8. Last but not least for God to prepare our hearts for the ways in which He will stretch us and challenge us to grow while we are there!
Prayers are appreciated, and updates will be attempted as we go throughout the trip.
"You did not choose me, but I chose you, and appointed you, that you should go and bear fruit, and that your fruit should remain, that whatever you ask the Father in my name, He may give you. These things I command you, that you love one another." John 15: 16-17
